Woman Slams “Narcissist” Mother for Saying Graduation Is “For the Family” and Not Students

A young woman named Grace (@saygracee23) said in a viral TikTok that her family (specifically her mother's side) tried verbally coercing her into walking for her high school graduation. The reason? Because these ceremonies were for the family and not the students, apparently.

Grace's stitched video begins with a question from another user on the social media platform who asked other TikTokers to share a trait their "narcissistic" parents have.

Grace went on to say that folks who graduate in her family have a tradition of receiving a copy of Oh, the Places You'll Go!, and a long letter from their parents.

She said when she was a kid she would read her mother's copy and would always dream of growing up one day to graduate from school and get her own copy of the book.

Her two older brothers who graduated before her ended up getting their own copies of the book, and she was happy for them while simultaneously counting down the days she got to hit this family milestone.

Grace then went on to say that she grew up with severe anxiety and mental health issues, which she would later be medically diagnosed with. One day, while speaking with her mother, she expressed that she wasn't really interested in walking at graduation and that the thought of walking on a stage with everyone looking at her might induce her into having a "panic attack" and vomiting in front of the whole crowd of people.

Her mother wasn't exactly thrilled with Grace's decision and, according to the TikToker, proceeded to tell her that she was going to walk the stage. When Grace put her foot down and said that she wouldn't be doing that, her mom then told her that the graduation ceremony wasn't "about her" but that it was "about us."

The TikToker prompted her mother to explain who "us" was, and her mom said, "your family."

Grace replied that graduations weren't about parents or grandparents or siblings or aunts and uncles, but rather the students who spent 12 years of their lives furthering their education.

"That was apparently the wrong answer," Grace said, as this prompted her mother to launch into a tirade, cursing her out and calling up her grandparents to share the vile and selfish news her daughter just hurled at her.

They seemed just as upset as Grace's mom was, stating that she was disrespectful for the way she behaved and that she should walk in spite of the angst she felt.

Grace then discovered that if you fail a single class, you can make it up over the summer and that students will still pass high school, they just aren't allowed to walk at graduation.

She then decided to intentionally fail a class with a "hard a--" teacher, and she told her mother that because her grades were suffering, she wouldn't be able to walk.

Her mother told her that she needed to go to the instructor and find a way to pass so that she can walk, and that if she couldn't convince him to do some extra work that would allow her to pass, then her mom would ring him up herself.

Grace decided to talk to him just to say that she did ... but the meeting didn't turn out the way she thought it would as her professor informed her that yes, she would indeed be able to pass if she completed a particular project.

The TikToker said her face dropped in this moment and that the "hard a--" professor was able to garner what was going on — she didn't want to walk at graduation.

Grace, sobbing, explained the entire situation to the professor who told her that he has kids of his own and that she doesn't have to walk if she doesn't want to do and that it's ultimately her decision and that she shouldn't feel the need to do it for her family.

The TikToker called him the "realest VIP of a human" as he assured her he was going to talk to her mother and inform her that there wasn't anything she could do to walk — she would simply have to take the class over the summer.

She ended up taking the summer class, got her diploma, and snapped photos with them to send to her family, who issued "petty responses" to her.

Because Grace didn't walk like her parents wanted her to, she already resigned herself to the idea that she wouldn't be receiving a copy of Oh, the Places You'll Go!

However, fast-forward some time after she sent the photos of her graduation to her family members, she was with her boyfriend, who she complained to about the entire situation, including the book. (She even added that her folks seemingly loved her boyfriend more than they loved her.)

The couple ended up staying at Grace's parents house after they went out to dinner with them, and during the dinner, they gave him a gift. He unwrapped it in front of them and saw that it was a copy of the very same book. Upon seeing it was the book, he set it down and looked directly at Grace, who said that she was putting a lot of energy into keeping it together in this situation.

Her folks exhorted him to open the book and read the note inside; he thanked them for their gift and said that he would read the message later. As the evening progressed, Grace decided to go upstairs to her room. Her boyfriend followed her and told her that he would "throw the book away" and apologized for the evening.

She told him that it was OK, he should keep it, and then the next day, they ended up leaving her parents' house even though they were supposed to stay there for several days. Grace added that it wasn't even for the book slight, but because they "disowned" her "for the most nonsensical thing ever," which she went into further context in the video below:

Several TikTokers who responded to Grace's video expressed sympathy with her and thought that a lot of Grace's story was in line with other narcissistic people that they were forced to interact with in their own lives.

Have you ever had to deal with "toxic" family members who tried forcing you to do things you didn't want to do?